There were two sheep grazing in a meadow .
"Baa-aa-aaa , ", said the first sheep .
"Moooooooo,", replied the second one .
"Ummm, what was that again , what do you mean by Moooooooo", questioned the first one .
"I'm studying a foreign language ,",explained teh second one .
by unknown/ annknown

how do you make an eggy laugh?
tell it a yolk by dunno

what do you call a song sung in an automobile ?
a cartoon by dunno

anna9 playing chess ....?%**** by anna9

Lessons Learned By a Parent 1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2,000 sq. foot house four inches deep. 2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with rollerblades, they can ignite. 3. A 3-year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant. 4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a superman cape. It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 foot room. 5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way. 6. The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan. 7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh", it's already too late. 8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it. 9. A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock, even though a 36-year-old man says they only do it in the movies. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day. 10. Certain Lego's will pass right through the digestive tract of a four-year-old. 11. "Play-Doh" and "microwave" should never be used in the same sentence. 12. Super glue is forever. 13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water. 14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O. 15. VCR's do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do. 16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes. 17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving. 18. You probably do not want to know what that odor is. 19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys do not like ovens. 20. The fire department in Austin has a 5 minute response time. 21. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy. It will however make cats dizzy. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy. by same Garfield site

You Know You Have Still Had Too Much Coffee When... *You've worn out the handle on your favorite coffee mug *You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee *You've worn the finish off you coffee table *The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you *Starbuck's owns the mortgage on your house *You're so wired you pick up FM radio *Your life's goal is to "amount to a hill of beans" *Instant coffee takes too long *You want to be cremated just so you can spend eternity in a coffee can *You name your cats "Cream" and "Sugar" *Your lips are permanently stuck in the sipping position *Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup by from ARCAMAX,from where I get my daily dose of Gar